I've been thinking about how to write this post for a long long time now. Far too long in fact, and I don't blame everyone if they've given up on me and assumed I've gone back to live entirely in the real world. I have some exciting news that has been rather too long delayed...
I am enceinte, gravid, expectant and fecund. I am with child. I have one in the oven. I am knocked up, in the family way and up the duff. In fact, we are going to have a baby in December.
My reasons for not blogging so far may be poor, but I'll make my excuses anyway. For the first 12 weeks it was not public knowledge, I felt hideous and ill all the time, and I couldn't settle myself to believe I wouldn't have an early miscarriage til I'd seen the 12 week scan and knew everything was fine. If I had been able to blog about it during that time, I think I would have sounded rather morose and depressed about the whole thing. Pregnancy seemed to mainly involve vomiting, having no energy to spare for anything but work, and being told lots of things I shouldn't do. None of it really felt real, even though we'd been wanting a baby for some time.
Since then I don't have such a good excuse, except that suddenly it all became very hard to encapsulate into words. Also I have been going to bed uncommonly early, due to feeling wiped out after a day at work, whereas late at night was when I usually used to blog. However, I had a week of leave last week, during which I slowed down enough to look at clouds, lie in bed feeling my growing bump, and think about things a little bit again. I also felt the baby moving for the first time, like a fluttering inside me, or like the feeling that I've just left my stomach behind on a rollercoaster. The bonding has been a bit slow to get started, but suddenly I'm really genuinely excited, and starting to feel how strong my love is for the tiny scrap of a thing growing inside me. So I thought it was about time I shared my news with you. Forgive me for taking so long.
5 comments:
hurrah for the post! 'we' have been waiting! ;) Glad you feel a bond coming on and that the holiday week was a good thing.
York in three weeks time so see you soon!
xxxx
Congratulations!!! I've wondered (along with the rest of your readers, no doubt) where you've been. What a happy (and grueling!) time for you.
Some of us subscribe, you know, and our handy machines check your blog all the time. Every time I see that you haven't posted again, I say, "Well, come back when you're ready." And now you have! Good.
Working and pregnancy are difficult. I did that with a few of my children, and even though the work was reduced to part time (and to no work by the end), I remember how tired I was. It's not easy; I prefer the part where one gets to lie in bed and feel the flutters.
Jen - hurrah- looking forward to catching up soon. are you going to be living in York?
Eve - Lying in bed and feeling the flutters - what an excellent description!
Yes, living in York. We ummed and ahhed for a long time but eventually decided that much. We're doing a flying visit next week in the hopes of finding somewhere to live before moving!
xxx
Yes I was waiting too - but like Eve I have a magic reader, so it wasn't stressful waiting.
So happy for the 3 of you. You don't know what to say, I don't know what to say! Wibble!
We'll have to make a trip up north soon to check in with all the mums to be.
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